‘You take the red pill…’

Now that I can speak enough Spanish to have conversations, albeit basic ones… I have discovered there are many people here who like to go barefoot…

The lady in the supermarket states that she would like to come to work with her feet bare… The man in the restaurant tells me that when he is at home he never wears shoes… The guy in the sports shop showed me his ‘war wounded’ feet because his feet are always naked… But he is often cutting them on the volcanic rocks of this island, and then because he is a surfer and so in and out of the sea, his cuts take a long time to heal… I suggested some socks for the rocks…

‘No no no, I want my feet to be completely free…’ He said, very emphatically… I understand, covered feet feel very different, especially once they have been freed again…

Once we have freed aspects of ourselves we cannot go back… Once we have taken ‘the red pill’ there is no return…

As Morpheus says in the Matrix ‘You take the red pill, you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes…’ In other words once we know shed any illusion, we cannot take up the blindfold again; once we see the truth of our nature we cannot stay in the place of denial or perceived chimera of safety…

Once we are free, we cannot be bound again; or else it was not true freedom, but part of the illusion…!

Once we have truly shed our shoes, we cannot put them on again… My free feet are a reflection of an inner change… Why else was I not able to run barefoot before, when I tried?

The untethering had not occurred within me, and the tension within was reflected in injury to my ankles, forward movement not possible… I was reflecting today as I walked up the beach at the end of my run how the last time that I tried to run in my bare feet – a few years ago now – my ankle got hurt that I said to Anadi… ‘I would rather be able to run that try to go barefoot at the moment…’ That was the truth for me at that time… I had to consciously honour exactly where I was…

We cannot be anywhere we are not, and if there is more to be lived out before we can work it out… So be it.

Trying to be somewhere we have yet to journey to, or somebody we are yet to become – is a trap and takes us miles away from freedom…. We are paradoxically far more free is we honestly accept where we are and who we are, even if we are in difficult or challenging circumstances…

I can remember many years ago, when I was a young woman in my mid thirties in a very difficult place in my life… I vividly recall one day, I was driving in the lanes of east Sussex acknowledging that I was the most unhappy I had ever been in my life, but that within all of it, I could almost viscerally feel that my spirit was growing… I had an innate knowing that I was living out exactly what I needed for my soul’s journey, and that I would work something out through the episode…

I did work something out and the experience leant itself to a new chapter in my life, and to an understanding that informed much of my teaching in the ensuing years… The wounded healer… As Carl Jung suggested, and I discovered to be true in many areas of my life… ‘Sometimes a disease was the best training for a physician.’…

‘The analyst must go on learning endlessly… it is his own hurt that gives the measure of his power to heal. This, and nothing else, is the meaning of the Greek myth of the wounded physician….’ carl jung

My orientation has always been one of ‘healer healer thyself’, as it is my experience that we must always have an ongoing connection to investigating of our own unconscious…

My own clearing  has always been the hub of all healing that might occur in the lives of others.

Any orientation other than this could mean that there is a attachment to ego and to ‘being a healer’ which is a form of inflation that ironically can block the healing possibilities for all…

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