I am immortal after all!

When my brother called me on my 60th birthday to wish me a happy day, only to discover that I was in hospital having collapsed on the bathroom floor at 6.30am with a suspected TIA ( mini stroke Transient Ischemic Attack) – he was shocked and upset…

‘But we all think of you as immortal’ he said…

It happened almost two weeks ago now, I am still not feeling 100 percent physically, although much much better. I have walked on the grass barefoot each day, and today I jogged around, enjoying the feeling through my soles of my soul in motion once again.

Throughout my life, I have often felt that I came here to run and to discover the essence of who I am in the running step – or in the case of my birthday – in the not run step…

Seeing the transitory ness of this journey… Being beyond this paradigm, was different to anything I have ever experienced, even in the most clear meditative state of living…

One minute we are alive and the next we are dead…

So while we are alive, it is important to learn, moment by moment to free ourselves from fear – and so fully live…

In recent years the attachment to my running has lessened, and with that has come increased enjoyment… In the last six months I have been training to run fast – as I have done throughout my life – but with the sense of fun I experienced as a little girl, when I would insistently ask my Dad that he come to the playing fields with me – so that he could ‘time me Daddy, time me…’ From the swings all the way speeding over the grass to the slide…

But it seems that I truly had a re birth day on May 12th 2019 – a new beginning.

Because every single test I have had is above normal healthy, from cholesterol (4 – more cake for me!!) BP (112/70) to my heart and my head, my liver and kidneys, my vagina and cervix – and all my bloods, my urine, every single test show health – not even a sign of a virus…

A mystery! It seems I am immortal after all… 🙂

I asked the doctor what happened… ‘I don’t know, body’s can do funny things, I don’t know…’

I am left with greater clarity, although I can’t put it into words… I am also left still feeling exhausted…

Anadi assures me, however, that if I were to have taken the spiritual investigation drug Ayahuaska – to explore, what my body dropped me into, without any prompt – that the experience of that drug can take some weeks to recover from…

I had been thinking about stopping nomading, staying put in one place… But since my birthday – I have clarity that I will continue moving, travelling light, staying in the step and seeing where the next one takes me…

I have been prompted to blogs again…

And to vlog…

And so it is…

Any illusion we have of certainty is but an illusion, the only safety and certainty there is, exists in the unchanging essence of our truest self…